Bob Sands

Aye that's not a surprise. Absolute prima Donna and there's no place at the Humble Bug for that so he can away and chase himsel as far as I'm concerned. He was the same at Arbroath. Apparently he'd stand at the changing room door with his top off before a game and make all the players touch his left pec on the way out onto the pitch. the Forfar Gazette described him as "frighteningly handsome but Jesus Christ did he know it." He refused to play alongside the boy Fotheringham there because he said he had a face only a mother could live and that looking at his puss across the pitch was making him dry heave. Good player but it's not the end of the world. He runs that Tappie Toories bar in the town so his head was probably elsewhere most of the time amyway. tit!!!

Canny believe Crossgates have just signed Hamish French. I thought the was doing nothing but driving the teexies up and down the town. You go from taking slavering arse holes from Brucefield (hole) to Harlem and now he'll be lacing up those boots and mouthing off to assistant linesman telling them to take their flags and shove them up their rectums. I'm chuffed to bits for him and we need a bit of steel in the midfield as it's currently filled with men who are turning up with a 12 pack of tampons in their kit bags. Thoughts?